It Never Ends

I am sitting on the floor of this concrete cell with two blankets and a sheet wrapped around me to keep warm.

The vent noisily blows cold air.

It is well past lights out.

The only light comes in through the small security window in the steel door.

I am sitting in the light so I can see.

I can't sleep.

And, I can't wake up.

I am thinking about God, the universe, reality...

The guard shines a flashlight through the window, sees me sitting on the floor writing, and is gone to the next cell in less than a half second.

I want to have a lucid dream so I can talk to someone.

I want to know who, what, when, where, and why I am.

I want to be free, from life.

I want to cry, but I can't.

I don't know why.

I want to die, but I can't.

I don't know why.

It never ends.

It never ends.

It never ends.

The pain never ends.

The beauty... never ends.